It weighs heavily on my mind that I am less than 12 months away from a “milestone” year, a term which I despise. Instinctually I’d react by thinking about my achievements, goals and where I would want to be before that day.

Then the second phase, “bargaining” begins. Then you say to yourself “you haven’t done that badly have you?”

We can see inevitably where this train of thought is going. I also know it is even worse to do these mental gymnastics routines while things aren’t going your way. But it’s inevitable.

Today for example I asked myself how I would feel if I was to conk out tomorrow. The expected outcome would be a surge of inspiration, positivity and rainbows. Instead I got this:

“I’d barrel through the gates indifferent, with a mortagage and engulfed in emails, spreadsheets and an unfinished to-do list.”

Positive.

I stewed on the thought, shrugged my shoulders and said to myself “so be it.”

I actually managed to get work done. Because in my glorious mind acceptance dropped all burdens of expectation. And if this is how I feel then anything better is a bonus.

Sometimes we need to get out of our own way to move ahead.

I never quite grasped the concept of a personal manifesto. However after reading one (on a website that shall remain nameless) I am warming to the idea that I should have one or at the very least have some kind of mission statement* that I should hold myself to.

*Note: The words ‘mission statement’ doesn’t sit well with me, on the verge of being annoying because it reminds me of fluffy abstract statements that corporations churn out to sound good but I can’t really think of a better name. My preference would be towards a personal manifesto as it can be more elaborate and detailed. Lets also be honest here, it sounds much better than a ‘mission statement’.

In a standard day I must admit that I can spend too much time focusing on (relatively) minor details, things that won’t matter years down the road, things like the next deadline, a shiny new gadget or bills that I need to pay. With so much focus on these niggly short term issues I have a tendency to lose focus on the big picture, the ultimate ideals and aims that I have as a person. Sure, I have the ideas to achieve these and I can rattle them off if someone asks. But I can’t say the same about the execution of these ideas or how regularly do I work towards these. Do I even have a plan in place to get there? I don’t always know, sometimes I think I do but I have a tendency to forget things, particularly when there is another small fire to fight and honestly in day-to-day life there always is.

I’d like to think that by having something written down, something that I can measure progress against and something that I can read each morning as a reminder then I can always check that I am living to my own stated ideals. It is also something that I can refer to when I am making life altering decisions. At the very least the process of taking these ideals out of my head and onto paper makes it something that exists.

Do you agree anonymous world?

It may sound a bit weird but I’m a big fan of boredom. As long as you play your cards right boredom can be constructive. Success with it hinges on three factors, how quickly you can detect it, finding the reasons behind it and what you do to deal with it.

Detection is key, without it the other two factors won’t come into play. In my mind the greatest example of this was from Michael Jordan after winning 3 straight NBA championships. He was at the absolute top of his game, yet he decides to retire to play baseball. Put simply he couldn’t find any more challenges in the NBA and he found that his ‘love of the game’ was gone. Long story short you can’t fix something if you aren’t honest with yourself about it. Jordan was honest, he needed some new challenges and even though he wasn’t so great at baseball it rejuvenated his love for basketball and it drove him to return better than ever and win 3 more NBA championships. To some extent I think we all have this problem, we are all good at what we do but are we doing it with the same enthusiasm and passion as we should? Are we merely doing a good job? Or are we pushing ourselves to find challenges and obstacles to overcome and to reach the next goal?

The search for reason is the hardest of the three factors. Because deep down inside only you know how and why you ended up in this state. Our minds can fool us sometimes, tell us that it is temporary or that we are being over-analytical but your heart knows. So in the immortal words of Roxette you need to ‘listen to your heart’. Everything that happens in life has a reason, don’t forget this. You can only fool yourself about your personal satisfaction to a certain extent and working purely for money can only take you so far.

Managed to get this far? Now we get to the fun part. Plan your way out of it. You get to choose – will your boredom be cataclysmic or a catalyst? How honest you were with your reasoning will determine your success at this stage. Ideally your reasoning should light a fire inside you to find a direction. You don’t need to plan out a entire personal renaissance but at the very least you need to know what makes you tick, get it all on a list, no matter how absurd it is. Once you’ve done this, take a step back and go through what you have. Is there a pattern? Is there something that you can look into further? Don’t panic too much if you are worried that you don’t have x,y or z. Skills and education can be acquired by dedication and application (if you really want something you will find a way).

Quick fixes? None really. You can binge, buy and escape boredom but these are temporary and unrewarding. Want something that lasts? Something that you can always rely on to get out of a bored patch in life? Get a plan.

I must admit that I have no interest in reading her books (though knowing me, one day I probably will) but her talk on coping with success/a gift is both engaging and amusing. Only at the end did I realise it was almost 20 mins long.

Link to TED.com

Thought a lot about typing a review of 2010 but it never quite eventuated. To put it in short form.

I…

• Lost my Grandma, who had been with me and our family since the beginning. Sadly sometimes there are things that you cannot control. A week that I would never forget.
• Found a way to slow down in life, switch-off (occasionally), lower expectations and just be in the moment (the ‘now’ haha).
• Tried to expand the social circle a bit more, sometimes with hilarious results. Met some wonderful people and got to know some people better.
• Went to Vegas (1st time), Italy (2nd time), Singapore and Hong Kong (for the however many-eth time). I choose to forget Macau.
• Met Sarah Wilson (one of those little moments of awesome that the world conjures up sometimes).
• Read more and wrote more too but still not as much as I would like to.
• Still can’t dance.